In last week's episode of EZ Conversations, I had the opportunity to host Dr. David Bilstrom. We spent an hour talking about how small incremental changes can influence our health. We touched on our gut health, including the microbiomes in different parts of our bodies that many people do not realize. We talked about the significance of Vitamin D and the importance of getting enough sunlight exposure. However, we spent most of our time talking about epigenetics. As I emphasized in my conversation with Dr. Bilstrom, once people realize they have greater agency in their lives through their choices, they can also rely on epigenetics to improve their physical and mental health. Dr. Bilstrom also shared a fascinating study in which participants were asked to meditate for 8 weeks, and they were able to influence 400 genes associated with inflammation. As Dr. Bilstrom highlighted, prayer, meditation and breathing exercises can all have the same effects.

As I reflected on my conversation with Dr. Bilstrom, I had the opportunity for some intense conversations with close friends. Last week was a tough mental one, and as I struggled, I felt like I kept falling into a deeper hole. However, one of my close friends asked me what was going well in my life amid the chaos. I had to pause, but I realized very quickly that everything I had been praying for over the past several years had finally come to fruition, and I was just riding a wave through, with peace and downtime around the corner. It was through prayer that I had experienced change.

But what struck me even more was this:

It wasn’t just that my circumstances had changed. It was that I had changed.

We often think of prayer as something external—something we direct outward in hope of an outcome.

But in many ways, prayer is an internal recalibration.

It slows us down. It grounds us. It shifts our attention away from chaos and toward meaning.

From a psychological perspective, prayer can function similarly to mindfulness practices:

And perhaps most importantly, it restores a sense of hope.

When someone feels hopeless, the body often follows—stress increases, sleep is disrupted, and the nervous system remains in a heightened state of alert.

Prayer, when practiced consistently, can begin to reverse that pattern.

One of the most profound psychological shifts that prayer creates is the movement from control to trust.

When we are overwhelmed, we tend to grip tighter. We try to solve everything at once. We carry more than we can hold.

But prayer invites a different posture:

To release what is not ours to carry.

This shift matters.

Because chronic stress is not just a mental experience—it is a biological one. Elevated cortisol, persistent inflammation, and a dysregulated nervous system all influence how our genes are expressed over time.

If meditation can influence hundreds of genes related to inflammation, as Dr. Bilstrom shared, then it is not a stretch to consider that prayer—especially when it induces similar states of calm, surrender, and presence—can have comparable effects.

There is a misconception that surrender is weakness.

In reality, psychological surrender is one of the most adaptive responses we have.

It allows us to:

In therapy, we often see that healing begins not when people fight harder, but when they stop fighting themselves.

Prayer creates that space.

It gives language to the inexpressible. It provides structure to uncertainty. And it allows individuals to feel held, even when life feels unstable.

Just like any habit, the power of prayer is not in a single moment—it is in consistency.

Over time, repeated states of calm, gratitude, and trust begin to shape:

And through the lens of epigenetics, these repeated internal states may also help shape our biological responses.

In other words:

The state you practice becomes the state you live in.

Looking back at my own experience, I realized something subtle but important:

I wasn’t just praying for outcomes. I was being shaped through the process of prayer itself.

The patience. The reflection. The forced stillness in moments where I wanted control.

All of it was preparing me—not just for what I was asking for, but for whom I needed to become to receive it.

We often separate science and spirituality into different conversations.

But what if they are pointing to the same truth?

That our environment shapes us.

And that environment is not just what surrounds us— it is also what we cultivate within.

Head to YouTube for the full episode. Or Subscribe below:

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