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Adapt: Re-framing Trauma Into Transformation
In last week’s episode of EZ Conversations, I had an incredibly raw discussion with Katie Baker (Listen Here). We explored Katie’s journey through early childhood trauma and how that shaped her life, where she was seeking escape through alcohol. After years of running from the pain and thinking she had it well-disguised, her son, at the time being 18, confronted her and intervened to let her know that she did not have to carry the pain of the past anymore. What was deeply profound in the conversation between Katie and her son, as she recounted in the episode, was the permission she needed to heal — permission she had not been able to give herself.
As Katie embarked on her journey of healing through the support of therapeutic psychedelics, things started to shift, and the voice that she had silenced through alcohol reclaimed its true essence. In the process of healing, Katie also healed her relationship with her mother, who, unfortunately, had brought men into Katie’s life that had been abusive. There was a deep sense of forgiveness and compassion in the experiences Katie shared—not as a denial of harm, but as liberation from carrying it forward.
As I reflected on my conversation with Katie, my work with people, and my own experiences, the word adapt kept surfacing. Perhaps my consciousness was picking up on it more than usual because it was something I needed to internalize. Often, we are so resistant to the messages life places before us that we continue to expose ourselves to more pain and suffering rather than accept what is and adapt.
From a psychological perspective, adaptation is not passive acceptance — it is active reorganization. It is the nervous system’s way of learning that survival is no longer enough; now the work is integration. Trauma research consistently shows that when we remain psychologically rigid, our brains stay trapped in threat-based processing, dominated by the amygdala and stress circuitry. This is why trauma often feels as though it is happening in the present, even when it belongs to the past.
Yet modern neuroscience has shattered the myth that the brain is fixed after childhood. Research on neuroplasticity shows that the brain remains capable of rewiring across the lifespan. Studies by Davidson, Doidge, and others demonstrate that intentional practices — reflection, therapy, mindfulness, meaning-making — physically reshape neural networks involved in emotional regulation, memory, and identity. This is the biological foundation of adaptation: we are not broken systems to be repaired, but living organisms designed to reorganize in the face of disruption.
Trauma disrupts meaning. Adaptation restores it.
Psychologist George Bonanno’s work on resilience highlights that most people exposed to trauma do not develop lifelong pathology. Instead, those who can reframe their experiences—rather than suppress them—are more likely to regain psychological stability. This flexibility is the heart of adaptation: learning to hold the truth of pain without allowing it to define the self.
As the title of this piece suggests, adaptation allows us to reframe our outlook on life. It is a sign of courage and strength. Despite things not working out as we had hoped, we choose to do something with what remains. What emerges is not just recovery, but transformation — a capacity to live with depth, compassion, and clarity.
Healing is not about returning to who we were before the wound. It may be about adapting to who we were always meant to become.
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