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The Intersection of Masculinity and Mental Health

The Intersection of Masculinity and Mental Health

Furkhan Dandia
September 16, 2025

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The Intersection of Masculinity and Mental Health

In last week's episode of EZ Conversation with Timothy Wienecke (Listen Here), we explored two complex and nuanced topics in the space of men's wellness, i.e. masculinity and mental health. There is a significant intersection between the two, as Timothy and I came to share during the episode based on our clinical experience. Many men feel that they do not know how to express themselves at times or feel shame in seeking help. While the narrative is slowly changing, we still have much more work to do. Timothy and I also discussed how specific figures in society offer men a solution, but this comes at a heavy price and can often mislead vulnerable men who are simply seeking connection. The issue is further perpetuated if these men lack suitable mentors or role models in their lives, whom they can look up to or go to for guidance.

As I reflected on my conversation with Timothy and was navigating an injury of my own, I realized how difficult it was for me to accept vulnerability and not feel shame. Shame is so pervasive, and can poke its ugly head in so many ways. Like many emotional experiences we have, shame has a purpose to illuminate something we are not willing to pay attention to. If we continue to hide the shame, it will continue to fester and grow stronger. I have to frequently remind myself, as I remind others, that the feelings and emotions we experience need to be expressed. Therefore, as I came to terms with my own injury and the fact that I had to rest for 4–6 weeks, especially if I wanted to heal, I had to confront the fear, anger, frustration, and shame I was experiencing. I had to be honest with myself about what the fear meant, and not beat myself up in shame. Masculinity does not mean we put on a brave face and act as if nothing is fazing us. Even if we are not feeling physical pain, we have a layer of emotions that is building up and needs to be released, and that comes through by making our mental health a priority.

This isn’t just a personal hunch. Research consistently shows that when men feel pressured to conform to rigid ideals—self-reliance at all costs, emotional control, dominance—they report poorer mental health and are less likely to seek care. A large meta-analysis found that higher conformity to certain masculine norms (especially self-reliance and power over others) was linked to worse mental health outcomes and lower help-seeking; the effect wasn’t subtle—it was reliable across 19,000+ participants. The American Psychological Association’s practice guidelines make a similar point: socialization into narrow “traditional masculinity ideology” can constrain psychological development and discourage men from expressing vulnerability or accessing support when they need it most.

That shows up in our clinics. Men will say, “I should be able to handle this,” or “others have it worse.” The data maps onto those stories: systematic reviews on men and depression indicate that endorsing traditional masculine norms is associated with delayed help-seeking, more externalizing (anger, risk-taking), and a preference to “tough it out” until things are acute. In practice, that delay doesn’t make the pain smaller; it often compounds it with isolation, substance use, or hidden shame.

And the stakes are high. National data continue to show that suicide remains disproportionately a men’s health crisis. In Canada, men die by suicide at roughly three times the rate of women, and recent surveillance shows thousands of families affected each year. Provinces echo that pattern; for example, in British Columbia in 2023, 75% of suicide deaths were male. These are not just numbers—they are brothers, fathers, sons, and friends. If our definition of “being a man” blocks access to care, then redefining strength becomes a public health intervention, not just a personal preference.

So what do we do with that? For me, it starts with honesty: naming the part of me that still wants to “push through,” then choosing a different response. Rest can be an act of courage. Saying “I need help” can be an act of leadership. In therapy rooms, I see men move when we normalize emotional language, invite body-based awareness (where tension, heat, or constriction sits), and then link those sensations to values: “What kind of father/partner/leader do I want to be?” When the goal is anchored in who we’re becoming—not what we’re avoiding—vulnerability has somewhere meaningful to go.

Mentorship matters too. When boys and men see healthy models—men who can set boundaries, own mistakes, apologize, and still command respect—the permission structure changes. Research on masculine norms suggests it’s not “masculinity” itself that harms; it’s inflexibility. Certain norms (e.g., responsibility, generativity, courage) can promote flourishing when balanced with openness and care, while rigid self-reliance plus emotional suppression predicts risk.

Practically, that looks like small, repeatable acts:

Choosing language that tells the truth (“I’m scared this won’t heal,” “I’m ashamed I can’t train”) and letting that truth be met with compassion rather than contempt.
Reframing help-seeking as a strategy, not failure—consistent with evidence that tailored, male-responsive approaches increase engagement and outcomes.
Building circles of accountability and care—coaches, elders, therapists, faith leaders—so that strength includes the capacity to lean, not just to carry.

If masculinity is the script, then mental health is the performance we deliver with it. Maybe the point isn’t to throw out the script, but to widen it—so that a man can be steady and soft, accountable and receptive, resilient and rested. That’s not a weakness. That’s wisdom.

References

American Psychological Association. (2018). APA Guidelines for Psychological Practice with Boys and Men. https://www.apa.org/about/policy/boys-men-practice-guidelines American Psychological Association

Gerdes, Z. T., Alto, K. M., Jadaszewski, S., D’Auria, F., & Levant, R. F. (2018). Correlation patterns of the Conformity to Masculine Norms Inventory. American Journal of Men’s Health, 12(5), 155–173. https://doi.org/10.1177/1557988317745910 SAGE Journals

Government of Canada. (2023). Suicide in Canada: Key statistics. https://www.canada.ca/en/public-health/services/publications/healthy-living/suicide-canada-key-statistics-infographic.html Canada.ca

Government of Canada. (2025). Suicide and self-harm: Suicide mortality (Health Infobase). https://health-infobase.canada.ca/mental-health/suicide-self-harm/suicide-mortality.html Health Infobase

Seidler, Z. E., Dawes, A. J., Rice, S. M., Oliffe, J. L., & Dhillon, H. M. (2016). The role of masculinity in men’s help-seeking for depression: A systematic review. Clinical Psychology Review, 49, 106–118. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2016.09.002 ScienceDirect

Seidler, Z. E., Rice, S. M., Oliffe, J. L., Fogarty, A. S., & Dhillon, H. M. (2020). Men’s help-seeking for depression: Attitudinal and structural barriers in symptomatic men. American Journal of Men’s Health, 14(5), 1–13. https://doi.org/10.1177/1557988320957054 SAGE Journals

Wong, Y. J., Ho, M.-H. R., Wang, S.-Y., & Miller, I. S. K. (2017). Meta-analyses of the relationship between conformity to masculine norms and mental health-related outcomes. Journal of Counseling Psychology, 64(1), 80–93. https://doi.org/10.1037/cou0000176 PubMed+1

BC Coroners Service. (2024). Suicide deaths in B.C., 2013–2023. https://www2.gov.bc.ca/assets/gov/birth-adoption-death-marriage-and-divorce/deaths/coroners-service/statistical/suicide_deaths_in_bc_2013-2023.pdf Government of British Columbia